Wisdom of the 3 Stooges.

If you don't know who these 3 guys are, you're more than  missing out. It should be considered a national crime not to know who Moe, Larry and Curly were, which to be exact, they were one of the most brilliant comedy trios of out lifetime.

They brought joy to millions, and even after their departure from this life, they continue to do so with re-runs, DVD sales and downloads of their comedy antics. I have been a 3 Stooges fan ever since my Dad had me sit down and watch a  few episodes with him. After that initial viewing, I was hooked.

The Stooges were a silly slap upside the head for Americans when times were tough - through the Great Depression, War(s). they poked fun at being poor and the real terror of war - even being brave enough to mock Hitler, WHILE he was in command. Pretty brave and funny if you ask me.

I remember my Grandpa telling me that those guys were the kings of comedy and they really helped people to smile and laugh during otherwise bleak times. That they "Put a little bit of cheap joy back into people's lives when it was most needed."

As most of you know, many people have been down in the dumps about the current state of affairs in our country and world in general. I say we could all learn a lot from the Stooges on the best coping mechanism when there isn't a lot you can do to control outside frustrations.

Laughter.

That's right, laughter. You lost your job? Well, so has most of us, join the club. Have yourself a good, hardy laugh about it, I promise it WILL make you feel better. Sure you might be worried about bills and whatnot, but I can guarantee you, it will all turn out okay. Things somehow have a way of working themselves out as they should. Just laugh at the fact that some poor slob will one day have your old gig - for less money and more stress. That should make you smile.

You sick with the Swine Flu? Grab a hot cup of tea and have a good chuckle at the fact you probably promised yourself you wouldn't get sick. Shit happens. Have a laugh and move on from it. Or look at yourself in the mirror - your matted hair and sallow complexion are sure to make you look like some zombie, kind of funny looking, eh? Go ahead and laugh a little. It's okay.

Wife, Husband or Lover leaving you? You are probably better off in the long run, but let yourself giggle - after all they are that person's problem now, and you get more room in your bed, and time to pursue worthwhile activities such as bocce ball (a fun game might I add), or just seeing friends that you haven't seen in a while.

Back when our parents were growing up, heck even our grandparents, they had far worse to worry about. World War 1 and 2 was no joke, but neither was the Korean War or Vietnam (or any war for that matter). I heard the Depression was no picnic, either. But you know what? Somehow, our grandparents and parents made it through just fine. A big part of what pulls anyone through down times is the power of a laugh.

Moe, Larry and Curly knew this and capitalized off of it, while doing some good in the world. While I am not saying you should run off and join some comedy troupe (although I hear it's a hoot), I am saying you should share a joke, watch a funny movie or even pick up a copy of the 3 Stooges material and laugh your ass off. It's really the only good thing to do in times when life is less than rosy.

Me, I try to laugh as often as I can. Over the past year, I've had some pretty screwed up things happen to me, that could have kept me down, but instead, I just had a good laugh at the absurdity of it all, and look forward to what is next around the corner for me.

It's really all you can do.

Laugh a little.

You'll feel better.

Moe, Larry and Curly did.

And they'll never be forgotten for it.

Later Gators....

A

When I Grow Up...

 For all you kids of the eighties, this epic scene in the movie BIG, starring Tom Hanks, probably made you wish that there really was a Zoltar machine that would grant you just one wish, and that wish would come true.

All I could think about was how cool it would be to just throw a couple of quarters in a machine and get the one thing that I wanted more than anything else. On a family trip many years ago, we stumbled upon one of these Zoltar machines. It wasn't nearly as cool as the real deal from the movie, but it had to suffice.

I still remember what I wished for. It came to me when I was digging through a box of mementos and discovered my Zoltar fortune card with a date written on it. 1989. I was about 9 years old at the time.

My wish? I wanted to be pretty. Now mind you, I was an ugly duck. Thick glasses, janky teeth, crazy hair. I was the epitome of nerd. Dorkus Maximus as I was so loving called by the class bully.

Now looking back at that wish so long ago, I realized, it came true. And thank goodness. But it didn't really happen until my later years in High School. Oh well, better late than never right?

But now that I am the ripe old age of 30, I wondered just what my wish would be this time around.  If you had a Zoltar machine and a quarter, what would you wish for? How would it be different than when you were a kid?

My wish now would be to have my "dream" job. At first it was just a loose sort of wish, I wasn't certain what that dream job would be. Then, the more I thought about it, it is working for an ad agency that has a toy company for a client upon which I got to do the strategy and creative concepting in addition to overseeing the digital direction too. I know that if I were to go and get that client, I would be in a far better position to doing what I want with regard to my work.

From there, I thought even further and fleshed it out to one day working as a Marketing Manager for a toy company, much like Tom Hanks did in the movie BIG. Sure, I would have to go back to school at get a Master's degree (more than likely anyways) but I could get paid to work around toys, the ideasmiths who come up with them, and the children who love them (at oe point I was in education and still do love being around kids).

When I think of the piano scene in the movie BIG, I connected it to the fact that SOMEBODY actually gets PAID to have fun and make a client/company money marketing hours of endless imagination and enjoyment for kids. At that point, I was sold. I am a fun-loving, creative and terribly silly person. Heck, I go to toy stores on the regular just to see what they have for kids nowadays.

And yes, I still try things out and now that I am older, I think of the strategy which that company should use to make an impact. I also look at the product and find the ways in which they should improve it, to make it more kid friendly. Have you SEEN the new Transformers? They are quite complex compared to what I had back in the day and the options aren't nearly as cool as when I was growing up.

But looking further down the road...

Maybe, just maybe, that wish for a dream job is an agency that markets the silly and offbeat? Maybe that agency happens to get a toy company client. And maybe that agency assigns me to it. And maybe down the road I will one day work for that toy company, or, run one of my own. Who knows. the options are endless.

Wishing I am sure will help, but just knowing it will happen and never doubting that it will (much like the faith that I had that Zoltar would make sure I became somewhat pretty) is sure to have me standing in my office one day with an electronic light-up floor piano underneath my feet.

Sure it will take some hard work, but wishing is a small first step.

Time to go find that Zoltar machine...

Best,

Anne

Shameless, Party of One.

To be shameless? What is it, really? (And isn't that little comic funny??? I found it here: http://reenapereira.tumblr.com/  - the stuff she likes is pretty cool.)

Is being shameless sharing things with others that some might deem potentially offensive? Or is it that annoying celebrity who will do just about anything to get noticed and generate a bit of press?

The dictionary describes shameless as this:
adj

1. having no sense of shame; brazen

2. done without shame; without decency, or modesty

I'll agree with that dictionary entry, wouldn't you?

For me, I think of it as the mindset that as a person, you frankly don't give a damn what others think of you. For example: look at women who prance around barely clad in any clothes. Some would label them sluts. Others would say they are just confident. Whatever spin you choose to put on it, bottom line, those women have chosen to be shameless.

Are you shameless? What things in your life have you chosen to be shameless about?

Perhaps you are clad in tattoos/piercings and chose to show them off, loud and proud - being shameless about what "the children" and elderly might think. I say, good for you. It's called freedom of expression.

Maybe you are known for having a sense of humor that leaves jaws dropping (like, did he/she REALLY just say that?! it is SO un-PC). Well, it's good that we can still poke fun at the absurdities in life and get a giggle from laughing at one another and what makes us all so different. Comedians do it all the time. And they make a pretty darn good living from it (well, the good ones anyways).

I am sure if George Carlin were here right now, he'd agree with me about the whole being shameless thing. He was a filthy comedian who built his rep being blunt and offensive to many. AND he also starred on a children's television show too! Rather shameless if you ask me...

Me? I have been accused of being shameless. Mostly for the fact that I am friendly and very outgoing - some call it being a "flirt" others have called it being a "tease" and a few times I have heard the grumble of the word "whore". Well, while I can say I am not a whore, I can readily admit that yes, I am a shameless flirtatious person. It's just part of my personality and who I am.

I like making people smile and feel good about themselves. Ugly, cute, old, young, men, women - it doesn't matter. I am very comfortable around people. The area that gets me into the most trouble though, is men. Other women LOVE to sling dirt about a gal who is comfortable just being "one of the guys" mixed with a  smidge of "hugginess".

It sends most women to the moon when they see a gal who can easily put a genuine smile on a guy's face, from cracking a joke, striking up intellectual conversation or just smiling at him.  It's even worse if that guy is taken, engaged or married. I have been told by quite a few women that this is disrespectful.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't pass out my number with a wink, or grab that what does not belong to me, but I won't pass up giving a friendly hug goodbye/hello or a congratulatory slap on the back. I know the line. And I tread it very carefully because as the saying goes, do unto others as you would have done unto you.



I will also say while we are on the subject of shameless, I do use profane language (when called for), I like crude humor and am not afraid to tell a joke that might make some blush (when the timing is right), I dress for the occasion (and sometimes a slinky little cocktail dress is called for), I socially will have a drink or two and guess what? I am not apologetic at all for it. I know how to have class and tact in certain situations, but I will not be policing every aspect of my life for fear of being too "shameless".

I say, let your freak flag fly. Be who you are. If it's shameless, then good for you. You are well on your way to what we call being comfortable in your own skin.  There are times when one must do some PR for their own rep, but usually that only has to happen when we take note that not everyone else views things as we do.

Life.
I'm here for the party, aren't you?
And so you can find me better...
I'll be the shameless one cracking that joke about the goat, while drinking a beer and chatting with some guys.

Catch y'all later...

A

Let's Be (Guy) Friends.

Image courtesy of: www.nataliedee.com

For those of you that know (or don't know) me, ask others who do know me rather well and they will tell you that I have quite a few guy friends. Guys who can at any time, pick up the phone and get unsolicited female advice on anything ranging from "Why do women do that crap!" to "So does a blue shirt with blue jeans look stupid?" (Yes, it DOES.)

Many of these guys, I have become quite close with and talk to just about anything that happens into the conversation. Female (and some other male) friends do not see how it is possible for two people of the opposite sex to get along as friends without there being the push for more from either party (not a worry with my gay guy friends - Holla!) But there were times with some of the other guys, I wondered why they never asked me out or pushed for more.

I did work up the nerve to ask one. And he told me he was content just to have me in his life as a friend, then not at all. He also brought up the point that if we had ever went out and it didn't work, there would have been that "awkwardness" forever after. Then there is also the point of a guy just not being all that into you "like that". Which, isn't a bad thing at all. In fact he told me "Your cool and all, but that would just be weird." Point taken.

Quite frankly, I like having a person I can joke around with, cry to, share in life's many adventures and have as a stand in as a real boyfriend when needed (of course). It just "works". Sure I may have a boyfriend now, but when I didn't, I liked having this pool of guys to tap for opinions on the guys I was dating when I was single. I almost always got an honest opinion.

"He's a tool." "He's just after you for one thing." "Was he serious with that shirt and hair? He looked like a douchebag." "Darlin', he might very well be gay. I think he was checking ME out."

Yes, I've heard it all from them. I also know that any guy worth a damn must be able to play well with my friends - meaning, get along with all of them. That is always the big test. If he is able to mix well with my friends, he passes. He can move past go and collect his $200.

But sometimes...sometimes dear readers there are those guys who you meet and become friends with and wonder about. Wonder if this guy or that one would be good for you beyond just being a friend. I have ventured down this slippery slope before and yes, it has in fact blown up in my face and the wounds still serve as a painful reminder that not everyone belongs together. That is why I have come to the conclusion that in love, much as it is in life, whatever will be, will be. If it is meant to happen it shall. You can't force anything or anyone and you are better to just have the men that you will keep only as friends.

So, as a "friend" to many men, I sit fascinated by them all. Hearing them tell me excitedly about their latest love interest and how funny she is or how nice she smells (yeah, some details I could go without), what new gadget they bought, or the bullshit call in the game that they were watching on the television, and agree to be a stand in date as needed to company functions or weddings, and smile knowingly.

I smile because I am happy just as he is to have an unconditional friend to share in this little adventure called life. I smile because I know whatever girl lands him or wife he chooses, that she will be very fortunate. And if she breaks his heart, I'll be the girl he calls to help pick up the pieces and take him for a beer to assure him not all women are evil, and the same one who will plot quietly to break that little snot's face for breaking his heart.

I think all women need good guy friends.

I'll keep my best guy friend though, as my boyfriend. After all, he started out as just a friend.

Best,

Anne

Teaching a Valuable Skill: The Art of "The Look".

Recently, I was faced with a most peculiar request from a friend who jokingly asked me how I managed to get the attention of just about any guy. Mind you, she said this while we were sitting and eating lunch in a crowded diner. She pointed out to me that different guys kept glancing over my way (to which I was oblivious to).

"Honestly?" I said to my eager to know friend, "I learned it from Liz Taylor" (see picture above). I told her how I watched old movies with her in it and how she could command attention from any man by not even saying one word and just giving him that "look".

"Look?" my friend said. "Ha! I don't believe you! Show me." So, I proceeded to show her a little trick I learned many years ago when I first watched the movie Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, starring Liz Taylor and Paul Newman. In the movie, Liz had a certain "come hither" look that she gave to her leading man and when she gave it, you best believe he took notice of her.

So, I told my friend to point out a guy in the diner so that I could demonstrate what I was talking about. I tried giving my friend "the look" but I couldn't stop laughing long enough to do so. It is a technique best observed in action so that one can learn.

My friend pointed out a guy, mid-thirties, sitting with another man in a  booth close to ours. "Well, go ahead. Let's see this look that you are talking about." she chirped to me. So, I glanced over a bit at the man. Just enough to catch his eyes when he was looking around a bit. He would glance over and I would shyly look away a few times.

Then when I caught that he was looking over at me, I tilted my chin downward a bit, and gave him the big "Doe-Eyed" glance with a coy smile.

The guy lit up like a Christmas tree and shyly smiled back. I looked away, so as to not "stare" for too long -just enough to get him to take notice. My friend squealed "Oh my Gawd! He is still glancing over here! Seriously! You should see it!"

So I looked over once again and this time glanced at him and gave a warm smile attached with another "look". My friend was in awe. "WOW. So that's what you're talking about, okay. I get it." I encouraged her to give a "look" to a guy that I pointed out, to which she got similar results. She was beaming from ear to ear.

By the end of our lunch, the waitress came over and I asked for the bill. She smiled and informed me that "the gentleman over there" had taken care of it. She handed me the receipt and his business card. I looked at it and flipped it over to read a note scribbled on the back...

"That's some look you've got. If I wasn't married, I'd be asking you out to dinner." - Jason

I smiled and nodded towards the man who politely nodded back. On the way out, I showed my friend the results that only a certain "look" can achieve. My friend decided to put her new skill to work and scored herself a date with a man who works in her building.

Ah, the power of the eyes...

Later,

Anne

Have You Settled?

Dear Readers:

This is what it looks like to NOT settle.  I know some of you may be wondering what the hell the picture of this weather-worn house has to do with anything, but for this post, it has everything to do with what you are about to read.

This is a picture of a house located on Peaks Island, in Maine and a big part of why I will never settle for less than what I want. I plan to one day have a home up in Peaks Island or Portland, Maine to retreat to during the summer so I can vacation with friends and family and take time to write from the inspiration that comes from such a serene place, far from the corporate and big-city wastelands.

If you haven't been to Maine, let me tell you, it's beautiful. The salty ocean air, the calling of the sea-gulls, the light-houses... it is truly a picturesque place. I think that all people should have a vision of what they want, much like I have this picture in Maine. Real, actual photos of things you want from life to remind you to never "just settle" and follow your dreams. Too many of us get caught up in the drudgery of daily existing, losing site of that dream and just settling for whatever happens our way at the time (Hello failed marriages/relationships - what if you had held out for Mr. Mrs. Unquestionably Right For You?)

I happen to have photos clipped of the things I want out of this life (in an album) and a hand written list that I carry on my person that serves as a reminder to always have that big picture in my mind. I don't sweat all the details of how I am going to achieve them (though I do have to work towards it), I just know that they will come if I focus on them in a positive manner, every day and count my blessings for what I have now and feel the joy from already "having" that item on my list. Some examples of items on my list: Take a trip to France, Get a new career,etc.

Don't believe me? Remember the last time something really good happened to you? Did you happen to think about it in a great way and then, poof! it happened? Well, it has for me, time and time again. It's when I stray and get into the negativity space is the point in which things start to go south and nothing seems to be going my way.

Sure, I have to put some work into seeing those dreams become a reality, but I won't stop half-way and just "settle" for less. A friend of mine recently confided in me that her life wasn't what she had pictured at all. She has a house in the suburbs, a husband, a career as a manager at a company she hates, and a schnoodle (dog). She told me that her dream was to travel extensively, become a fashion buyer and live in Chicago. Obviously, that did not happen. Somehow she settled for less.

"I just settled Anne. I took the easy way to a life I thought I wanted." I assured her that it wasn't too late. It never is. She had options. She could very easy go back to school in the evenings, get her advanced degree, pack up the dog and husband and move to Chicago. Just hearing me utter those words she became filled with zest. "You are right! I should damnit. Why not? I mean, I only have a few classes that I would have to take to get another degree and I have connections in Chicago and as far as the husband, he can get work anywhere."

She hung up the phone with me and then some days later sent me an email letting me know she signed up for classes. See, this is called not settling. The same applies in all areas of your life. Professionally, personally, etc. If you are not happy and want something more, then set about getting it.

Don't get to the end of your road and have regrets. Look at each day as an opportunity to move closer to your goals and dreams and QUIT SETTLING for the mediocre. In life, we can all check out at any time, with little to no warning. Scary thought, I know. But it is the hard reality. We are human and we are only given so much time to make it count.

So, I am sure I'll be writing a best selling novel one day from my beach house in Maine, while sipping a good white wine and toasting to the sea gulls who secretly know that I didn't settle.


What will you be doing today and tomorrow, heck, even the next day to ensure that you stop settling?

Best,

Anne

Crazy? Sure. It's Located in Aisle 5, Right Next to the Candy...

Yes, for those of you wondering, that IS a picture of Crazy Harry, a beloved Muppet, created by Jim Henson. And yes, he is awesome.


The only time Crazy isn't awesome is when you come face to face with it, and it isn't the Muppet, er, Harry.

Anywho, this post isn't about dear Crazy Harry, no, it is about crazy and how we can find it just about anywhere these days. Why, even in the grocery store, in a candy aisle near you...

It was mid-afternoon and I had just finished a great lunch meeting and decided to run and errand before heading home. I stopped at the local [gasp] Super Wal-Mart because I really didn't feel like making the trip all the way over to another grocery store across town, or fighting parking at the grocery stores located in the downtown area. This was my first mistake. I should have NOT went to Wally-World...

Inside the store I grabbed up some bananas, lean ground beef and dark chocolate (odd combo, I know) and then I made my way further up the candy aisle to get some bubble gum. I noticed a man, perhaps in his mid-forties, average looking, and sweats. He looked normal enough and I even caught him glancing over at me every so often and quickly started staring at the floor when he realized I had noticed him staring at me.

He was to my immediate right and looking over the gum selection when I noticed him staring at me again. Instead of getting annoyed with his persistent staring, I turned to him, smiled and simply said "Hello." I figured it we be a nice thing to do.

Boy, was I ever wrong about that. Instead, the man began screaming at the top of his lungs and shrieking loudly "Don't Look at Me! Don't Look at Me! You'll Burn Me!!!" this of course caught me completely off guard.

Soon, other shoppers began peering down the aisle and a store associate approached to see what all the commotion was about.

The man kept right on wailing loudly and begging me to not look at him. He moved away from me, shielding his face and cowered against a display. I of course felt terrible and approached him, asking him what I did. He screamed wildly and backed away again.

Finally, store security showed up and asked me what I had done. "Nothing" I replied. I had just smiled at him and said "Hello". They instructed me to make my purchases and leave. Weird, I thought, they are asking ME to leave when clearly this poor chap was a few french-fries short of a happy meal.

Walking away, he continued to yell at me and instruct other shoppers not to look at me, that I would burn them. You would have thought he had seen death itself in my eyes or something. I will readily admit that I felt completely embarrassed of the spectacle.

On my way out all I could wonder was what the hell set that guy off in such a fashion.

I am reconsidering this whole saying "Hello" to strangers any more...

Later.

A